I’d like to take the time to tell you about a new interesting product.
Dali Melting Time Clock is the best way to agree with Einstein. He basically said that time does not exist.
I tend to agree with him. Which is a first, because I’ve actually proved his theory of relativity wrong because he uses the speed of light in his equation. If you really want to get technical, his theory of time travel is impossible because your weight will become infinite once you reach the speed of light. Yah, well how about if you don’t have any mass? Well, therefore your theory is crap Einstein, crap!
Speaking of crap, back to the facts. Time is very relative. For example, today seemed to last a really really long time. But that’s just me. See how that works?
It’s kind of like a chick going to Mexico and lying about cheating on her boyfriend. Stay with me on this one. When she comes back and tells him how her trip was she doesn’t even mention that ugly guy, almost like he doesn’t exist!
Just like time!
Oh well. The crazy thing is that kind of stuff happens all the time. Not to me though. That would be preposterous.
But the reality is people do that all the time and are total douchebags. They kind of deserve a clock like this to match the rest of their life. Oh yah, and also a shirt they should wear to let everyone else know they suck. Probably something like “I went to Mexico, cheated and am a total douche, and all I got was this lousey shirt and probably crabs, oh yah and a new boyfriend.”